17 days post op!

I have been doing great, all weekend too. Some days I forget I had surgery at all! But today for some reason, the side of my hip hurts pretty bad. But I did forget to do my stretches last night so maybe that's it.

I'm up to 15 minutes on the bike, and I do it in the morning for "fasted cardio", hehe. Gotta get it in somehow!

I am really missing running, especially this time of year. So desperately. The hubs and I signed up for a 2 mile race when I will be 10 weeks post op. I fully intend on walking and pushing the kids in the double stroller, but I couldn't not do it. It's my favorite race ever! I did the 5 mile run last year, and the 2 mile the year before. I just love everything about it. 

But hopefully by the fall I can at least start up running, if not be running 5ks by then! I want to do some races this year!

I'm going to leave a picture of my stitches. I actually go for my 2 week post op appt on Friday, and I'll get them removed, thank goodness.

10 days post-op

I feel like everything has been pretty steady the past few days. Nothing changing much- which is sort of a bummer but I'm also still ahead of recovery so I shouldn't be too down on myself. I was telling a friend the other day that I'm doing really well, and sometimes it's not always a good thing bc I feel so good but still can't do things like I used to! Or I overdo it bc I'm feeling good at the time, and pay for it later. 

That's kind of how the past few days have played out. Feel great in the morning, but by the afternoon I'm laying down icing for the rest of the night.

The good news is- my PT cleared me for lifting upper body. So I have been in the gym the past two mornings. My plan is to go 4x per week, and add a 5th when I can. It's all upper body, so it's not as much as I want- but I'm so happy to be doing something!

Not to mention my twice per day PT exercises! I'm also up to 10 minutes on the bike, twice per day. 

I think my biggest complaint is my back- which may or may not be related to FAI anyways. But my PT said when I can get my abs stronger too (not until 4-6 weeks after surgery, though) that it should help a lot.

So anyways, just trucking along. I haven't been eating great but I hope to fix that next week- officially 2 weeks post op!

Day 7 post op

I'm in my CPM machine right now, and it's set at a 90! That's what I was supposed to be at by 2 weeks post op! 

2 days ago I wrote that I ig he have overdone it by a trip to the grocery store ... It was the truth. So all day Saturday I did nothing but lay around all day, besides doing my exercises twice that day. It must have done the trick bc I feel great so far! Even though I've only been up for about 45 minutes. :) 

My lower back on the right side has been hurting a bit, like it did pre surgery. My doctor warned me it might not be related to FAI at all, but I was hoping it would so that annoying pain could go away. My friend who had the same surgery came over on Friday, and told me that it does. So I'm still holding out hope!

Day 5 post-op

I'm just sitting here in my CPM machine, bc my thigh was starting to tighten up a bit. Probably bc I might have overdone it a bit today. My husband and I went to the grocery store (after dropping the kiddos off at my sister's for the day) bc we are going to a "Freezer meal" party tomorrow. I think it was just too much walking. Not to mention, prepping food for said party and being on your feet. The CPM is actually helping out the tightness though. 

Speaking of, I probably only have been using it 3-4 hours per day. It's just hard to get it all in when I was going to PT, and doing stretches and icing, etc. Plus I like some time to not have my leg hooked up to something! 

I have been doing pretty good. I don't need the crutches at all unless I'm going longer distances. I attribute that to being really active and lifting up until surgery. I know I can't push it though otherwise. 

Last night I slept GREAT, bc I was able to sleep on my stomach! Before that my back was starting to hurt from laying in 1-2 positions all the time! 

I'm also starting to get my appetite back. I told myself I'd take it easy for a week or two and then really buckle down on diet. Although, I haven't been stuffing my face or anything, bc I really couldn't anyways! No room for some reason (maybe bc I haven't pooped in 5 days- sorry TMI). 

Still doing PT exercises twice a day and riding my bike twice a day for 5 minutes no resistance. 

Still taking pain meds but feel like I could space then out much further. I am just really sore and I bet a lot of that is from PT itself! 

Not going stir crazy yet, but going "this house needs cleaned!" crazy. :)

Surgery details

Man, this laying around thing is actually pretty exhausting! I'm pretty sure I had in my head that I'd have time to watch all the shows, read all the books and blogs, and be able to complete anything I wanted. But I was clearly mistaken! I'm just so tired and have such low energy, and I use a lot of it at PT, or just walking to the bathroom every hour. I literally feel like I'm taking turns in the Game Ready and CPM  too. 

I'm not in a lot of pain other than this burning/tingling feeling in my leg where the incisions are. Obviously I'm sore, but I'm not in any hip pain like I've had. So that's good. 

But you probably want to hear how the surgery went .... And luckily, it went awesome- as far as my doctor was concerned! I think I was in surgery for 3.5 hours, and most of that was shaving the bone down. Apparently, my impingement was pretty bad, that it was putting pressure on my cartilage and making it soft (it's not supposed to be soft). I'm not exactly sure what that means, but I think that if it were to continue going on (like if I didn't get the surgery), I would've gotten arthritis pretty early and probably a total hip replacement. So my doctor actually said he was glad we caught it early, which makes me feel SO much better about getting the surgery done, too.

The other good news is .... I didn't have to get my labrum repaired! No anchors into my bone! Yay! So that'll mean easier recovery. Apparently some of the labrum was fraying at the edges, so he just cut it off, but it wasn't torn. 

He gave me several pictures, and one of them showed all of the irritation where the impingement was, so again, that confirms I made the right decision. I know i was really hard on myself and kept questioning if I should go through surgery, but after all is said and done, and from what my doctor said I think we are all in agreement it was the right thing to do. 

In fact, it makes me want to do the other one later this year for sure. Of course, I'm still hoping all of the symptoms on my non operative hip will disappear, bc no surgery is better than no surgery though, ha ha!

I had PT today and I go again tomorrow, but it wasn't bad at all. I also rode the bike at no resistance for 5 minutes, and was told I could do that twice per day. My therapist gave me a talking to about not pushing it, bc she knows I love to be active but I can not overdo it now. I feel like I have no worries in the state I am now, bc I'm just so tired! In fact, I know I wanted to try lifting upper body soon, but I literally couldn't if I wanted to! No energy! Maybe once I am completely off pain medicine I'll feel better ...

Surgery = complete!

I'm not even sure where to begin. But I do know I have low energy so hopefully I can finish this post before falling asleep. 

For starters, I got up at 1:30am to shower with some special soap, and we hit the road at 2:30am to drive to Columbus. We had to check in at 5am. Everything went pretty well in pre-op, but once I saw the NP (whom I really like),the  tears started flowing. Just nervousness. Then the doctor came in and signed my right leg, followed by anesthesia to go over that. Before I know it, I'm getting wheeled back to the OR. On the way they gave me meds to make me a little loopy. I remember scootching over to the operating table, and the nurse said they had to go around and introduce themselves and their roles in this surgery. At the time there were maybe 6 people in the room, but I fell asleep after the 2nd person (my doctor) said his name. :)

Next thing I know, I'm being woken up. It seemed like it was from a dream, and then I realized how badly my right hip felt, and it all came back to me- that I just had surgery. I think I was going in and out of sleep, but I was also crying bc of the pain. I can remember my doctor asking the post-op nurse how I was, and she said I woke up crying--- I feel like I tend to do that after surgeries. Anyways, my doctor briefly went over the surgery, but that was a little foggy to me. From my hip down to my knee felt like immense pressure from all the fluids. I mean, brutal! It felt like a balloon that was about to pop! My actual hip did not hurt much, just the pressure was unbearable! I was given more pain meds, and I started feeling a little sick. 

Suddenly, it was time for my nurse to go to lunch, so I got these 2 male nurses. Here's where it all went downhill. I was in terrible pain and crying, and they were talking about apartment hunting. Then they were saying they wanted me to get dressed so I could go home. For all I knew I just woke up 2 minutes ago! Finally my nurse came back. My doctor also came back again and went over everything again for me, and I was able to understand a bit better (more on that later). Once he left, my husband came back to wait with me. I was dressed at this time, and they called PT to come meet with me. She gave me a few exercises to do at home, and had me practice with the crutches. Getting up to move around made me feel SO SICK. But they sat me down in a wheelchair so I could get ready to go to the car. 

Side note: I remember my doctor telling me that I would stay the night if my pain wasnt under control, or I was really sick coming out of anesthesia. Well, the nurses made a bad call in sending me home bc I felt that way until 8 hours later.

So I'm wheeled out to the car, get situated, and start throwing up. A lot. But we kept driving. I was also in and out of sleep too. But the drive was just miserable. I felt horrible and sick. 

We got home and I'm still not in any better shape. Just lots of sobbing. I finally force myself to eat Jello to settle my stomach, and it seemed to work. I took a nap while hooked up to my CPM machine, and woke up feeling much better around 7pm. I could eat Goldfish crackers and finally take more pain meds. 

The rest of the night and all of today was a bit of the same- ice with the Game Ready, do the CPM, my PT exercises, take meds, nap. My parents brought us dinner tonight so that was good. 

All in all, once I got over the initial awful phase, it's been going fairly well. I'm really sore, but doing ok. I don't have to use my crutches but for stability. I don't use them a lot bc it's just easier not to half the time. 

Tomorrow I have PT in the morning, but not before a shower that I'm really excited about, hehe. The kids are going to my sisters house for the day... I think that'll be so good for them bc they seem

to be going stir crazy in the house- at least the little one. 

I know I left off details of the actual surgery, but I will have to do that tomorrow. I'm just exhausted after writing this much!

2 more days ...

I just finished my last hardcore workout for awhile, I imagine. I was actually growing quite fond of my workout routine. I'd lift 4 days per week, and then do 20-30 minutes of hard sweating-buckets cardio afterwards- which usually consisted of the stair stepper or ARC machine. I also did about 4 25-minute sessions of fasted biking each morning, too. I have grown so much appreciation for hose workouts where you feel like you earned your shower. I got those with running too, obviously, but these felt just as great. 

My surgery is in 2 days. Actually, in exactly 48 from this moment, I will already be out of surgery and quite possibly on my way back home to my girls. One thing that I'm actually having a really difficult time with is not being able to really "care" for my girls for a bit. My husband will have to do mostly everything for at least the first few weeks. They can pretty much just lay in bed with me, and that's it. That realization is really hard on me. I feel like I'm on the verge of tears daily bc of it. Not to mention, my big girl is starting kindergarten in the fall, and it feel like I'd be missing out on the last few months we have her at home all day. I was actually thinking of pulling out all of their Disney movies, and we can watch movies together everyday. 

I feel like, lately, every time I do something- even like putting on makeup while standing at the counter, I'm like "Probably won't be able to stand up to do it for awhile!" I'm not taking a thing for granted beforehand. It's really hard bc I'm not in awful pain day in and day out- more like a nagging burning pain that if I HAD TO I could deal with it (but if you read my last post, I explained why I chose not to deal with it everyday and get a surgery instead). But in just 48 hours (or less), I will have that awful pain, most likely all day long, too! For weeks, or months! And this is the part where I go whhhhhyyyyyyy am I doing this? Should I just not show up to my surgery??

Anyways, we are down to the wire and I'm doing my best to get everything ready. For myself, the kids, the dogs, the house, and whatever I can do to make it easier on my husband. Not to mention, I just got a pedicure and eyebrow wax, so that I won't have to do those for awhile either. :) As luck would have it, we were invited to a freezer-cooking party, so that'll be some of our frozen meals so I won't have to cook, or eat my husbands Mac-n-cheese every night. :) Oh! And we got my handicap parking pass too.

Next time I post, I'll have had my surgery. Oy vey ...

If you don't know ... (Maybe you won't ever know)

I can't figure out how to write this post without getting overly emotional or even a little passive aggressive. My goal is to just explain that this surgery isn't just a little thing, and is a lot more serious than others will ever understand, it seems. 

I am a really active person. It usually involved running somewhere around 20 miles per week, but since I haven't been able to run distances bc of the hip pain, I can manage to do 20-30 minutes of low impact cardio several days per week (the bike, elliptical, stepper, ARC machine). Not to mention lifting weights. However, my true love is running- even though I don't always love it. :) 

Bc of my hip pain, it's been more difficult for me to be able to do anything active. The severity of pain differs for what activity I'm doing, but that's incredibly defeating. How is it that I'm only 30 and still "young", but the only options for relief is either NOT being active, or surgery? I feel like bc of my age, NOT being active wasn't an option. I hope to have 30 years+ of activity! 

Let's talk pain ...

I feel like I don't know how to describe it accurately than constant sharp, sometimes shooting, burning, achy pain. Sometimes I feel relief when I don't do activity for awhile- but like I said, I like being active! I had to give up running entirely a couple of weeks ago bc I hurt badly for 2 days afterwards worse than just everyday stuff. 

The point is, without feeling it, you don't know what's it's like. It's a strange thing. Not to mention, it's not one of one things that just "goes away" over time. It's the shape of your bones rubbing on each other. Time cannot heal that. I could try to "give it time" for years and it still wouldn't go away on its own. 

My decision to have the surgery did not come easy. At all. I'm fact, I am still really, really nervous, just 4 days away from my surgery. I won't know if it will have been worth it for months (but better to try than just sit around doing nothing about it). And I feel as though since I'm still walking around fine, still working out, and living my everyday life- that people assume that I'm "fine", and don't need a surgery. Nor do people understand that by my signing up for the surgery, that I'm signing up for a really long and likely painful recovery. Did I choose to do it? Yes. I'll take responsibility for that. But the alternative was living a sedentary life, and that's not ok with me. 

Someone asked me the other day "Is it just a scope surgery?" Well.... Yes.... but it's way more intensive than other "scopes" (I say that from experience on a scope I had done 6 years ago). During my surgery I will have my hip actually dislocated to be able to do the shaving of bone, etc. That's pretty invasive if you ask me. After surgery I won't be able to sit at a 90 degree angle for a little while. I'll have too learn how to walk again, basically. 

Ok I'm rambling. I think I'm just kind of fed up with the misunderstanding of this surgery and recovery. Not to mention my pain tolerance (if I'm just being a "baby"). This is where I have to say, I'm so thankful for my husband and his incredible support. I asked him the other day, when he realized it was more serious, and he said when he went to the doctor with me, and heard all about this condition and the details of the surgery and rehab. It took him going to the doctor to fully grasp what's going on with my hip, and that made me sorry I can't have a whole panel of people at the doctor with me, so that they too understand. But regardless, my husband is fully supportive of my decision and I'm blessed to have his help (emotionally, physically, etc) through this journey. If he is all I would have, that would have to be enough for me!